79 – THE WORLD TODAY ACCORDING TO DAISY

 

Opting to pass on the opportunity to get into a discussion about the merits of the best book written in the past hundred years, or more, in favour of plunging even deeper into Daisy’s mind, Kitty continued the examination by asking, “What else? What else is in the news today?”

“Well, there’s a funny story, about a white guy in Texas. He’s an old, blind guy. He’s filed for divorce, because he just found out his wife is black.”

“That is funny,” Kitty laughed.

“It’s gonna be a whole Hella funnier when he finds out he’s black, too, and all their kids are white!”

The laughter that erupted from Kitty encouraged Daisy to keep going, with no further prompting. “And there’s a real funny story from Oklahoma. There was a black guy making deliveries inside a gated community. Probably all whites inside, like South Africa used to be. So, some cracker, claiming to be the head of the homeowners association, stopped him, demanding to know what the Hell he thought he was doing.”

Baffled, Kitty asked, “Why is that so funny?”

“Well, I saw a pic of the white dude, and he is butt ugly, so I think the real story is this. The black dude was delivering a new fuckbot for the cracker, ‘cause he way to ugly to get any real pussy, for sure. And the fuckbot ran away, and jumped back in the delivery van, when she saw how small the cracker’s dick is. And the cracker didn’t like that, ‘cause his ex-wife left him for a black delivery driver, when she intercepted his secret order of Bubba sized, crotchless bitch panties.”

It was just too good to stop, so Kitty asked, “What else, Daisy?”

Daisy thoughT for a bit, contorting her face a few times, before finally answering. “Well, it ain’t in the news today, but I been wondering about something.”

“What?” Kitty asked.

“Well, you know how everyone is clamouring about getting back to work, ‘cause the virus is only killing old people, or mostly only old people? Well, that don’t surprise me none, ‘cause no one cares about old people. That’s why everyone sends them away, warehouses them in old folks homes, and we all know how bad things inside those Hellholes gets sometimes, what with the staff from Hell, or maybe one of Mr. King’s book. So, what the Hell does anyone care about a disease that kills ‘em? Just means they don’t have to pay to keep alive no more, so, really, they’re happy they’re dead, ‘cause now they get the inheritance.”

No one bothered to contest anything Daisy said, so she carried on. “But now, a little while back maybe, there’s problem with some kids, in Europe. They’re starting to get lung problems, and the scientists are saying the disease may be the virus mutating, and attacking kids.

“Well, I think that will change things, if kids start getting infected and dying. That’s when even the Freedom Fries Fighter guys will say, ‘Whoa! Hold yer horses, now. Maybe we shouldn’t go back to work.’

“But I can’t figure out why they would say that, ‘cause any people who don’t give a damn about old people, shouldn’t give a damn about kids, neither. If you think about it, trying to use the brain of a gun guy, kids are just as useless as old folks. I mean they ain’t got no jobs, can’t get no jobs, ‘cause they ain’t got no skills, so they can’t pay no taxes. So, what good are they? No good to society at all. All they are is a bunch of retarded parasites, so why not let them die, too?”

“Have you ever thought about starting a news blog?” Lance wanted to know. “You could call it, The World Today, According to Daisy.”

“Oh, Hell no. Ain’t nobody reads nothing no more. But maybe I should start my own Youtube channel. But I would call the show, ALL THE FILTH I CAN SHOVEL, ALL THE SWILL YOU CAN SWALLOW, ‘cause that’s pretty much what the news is, anyway.”

80 – DAISY TROLLS

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